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nicole melamed

Another Year Another Fathers Day

06/12/2020


As soon as Memorial Day rolls around, I know it coming. The influx of commercial propaganda about Father’s Day. It slams me in the face every day. The television commercials, the displays in the supermarket, and even skimming through social media, there is ad after ad for this holiday. Father’s Day is one of the most challenging days for a widowed mother. So, it is not just Father’s Day that is a visceral reminder of what my children have lost, but it’s the weeks preceding the actual day.


By no means do I feel that dads shouldn’t be honored on this day, but when your children face years of fatherless Father’s Days, it is pretty anguishing. When I sent my eldest to college, I feared for father/son weekends and events. As I prepare to send my second off to college, I am now faced with that fear again, father/daughter weekends, meeting new people that “don’t know.” Her having to reveal the ever so painful words, “My dad passed away,” what I would give for her never to have to utter those 4 agonizing words.


I have tried to protect them and wrap them tightly in a bubble for these past 4 fathers’ days. But still, it’s right there, on Instagram and Facebook, as my kids scroll through their feeds, everyone posting, “To the best dad ever…”. It’s a jagged knife back into an already gaping wound that will never fully heal. With the lump in my throat that arrives weeks before and especially on the eve of every Father’s Day, I will say (an early) Happy Father’s Day to all the great dads out there, especially my husband, who has set the bar extremely high in the Dad department. Even though he is not physically here with us, we will continue to honor him on this commercially-filled holiday.

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